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你来我往 (nǐ lái wǒ wǎng) — (chengyu) to give and take; back-and-forth exchange (of words, blows, favors, etc.)

Definition

A four-character idiom for reciprocal exchange — favors, gifts, words, or blows — between two sides. Often pairs with 互相 to stress mutuality.

idiom
(chengyu) to give and takeback-and-forth exchange (of words, blows, favors, etc.)

Examples

  • 你来我往，。
    Tā men zài biàn lùn huì shàng nǐ lái wǒ wǎng, hù bù xiāng ràng.
    They went back and forth in the debate, neither side giving in.
  • 你来我往，。
    Liǎng rén zài quán jī chǎng shàng nǐ lái wǒ wǎng, dǎ dé fēi cháng jīng cǎi.
    The two went at it in the boxing ring, fighting brilliantly.
  • 你来我往，。
    Jié rì qī jiān rén men nǐ lái wǒ wǎng, hù xiāng zèng sòng lǐ wù.
    During the holidays people exchange gifts back and forth with each other.

Origin

Compound word
构词法gòucífǎ
联合liánhéCoordinate

Two parts of equal weight, alike or opposite in meaning, standing side by side.

你来you come
你nǐyou来láicome
主谓Subject + predicate
我往I go
我wǒI往wǎnggo
主谓Subject + predicate

The paired actions 你来 and 我往 alternate, giving a sense of back-and-forth exchange.

Characters in this word

Most characters — around four in five — are built this way: one part hints at the meaning, the other at the pronunciation.

Meaning part形符xíngfú
亻Written in full as人rénperson
Sound part声符shēngfú
尔
尔ěr你nǐ
The sound has drifted apartThe sound part was a clue two thousand years ago — it often still helps, but not always.

The left part 亻 is a person, and the right part 尔 supplies the sound.

Open 你 →

A drawing of the thing itself, worn down over three thousand years into a few strokes.

This origin belongs to the traditional form 來; 来 is its simplified writing.

The traditional form 來 shows a wheat plant: a central ear, upward leaves, and downward stem and roots. The simplified 来 is a later shorthand.

Open 来 →

A drawing of the thing itself, worn down over three thousand years into a few strokes.

假借jiǎjièLater borrowed for its sound alone — the picture has nothing to do with today’s meaning.

The glyph 我 originally drew a trident-like weapon. It was borrowed purely for its sound to write the pronoun "I", so the picture and the meaning are unrelated.

Open 我 →

Most characters — around four in five — are built this way: one part hints at the meaning, the other at the pronunciation.

Meaning part形符xíngfú
止止zhǐfoot
Sound part声符shēngfú
王
王wáng往wǎng
Same sound today

The form that became 往 paired 止, a foot, with 王 for the sound; a stepping part was later added, and the right side changed.

Open 往 →
Appears in
Communication & SpeechIdioms & Set Phrases

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